Top 31 of 2006: #30

Mastodon: "Blood Mountain"

Released: September 12, 2006

There has been an All-Points-Bulletin out since Mastodon unleashed the beast of an album that is "Blood Mountain." It's not for an escaped prisoner or a sexy Washington intern. Hell, it's not even for a human being. No, this APB was instated for one thing, well, two things. My balls! Yes, it seems as though my balls have been severely rocked off by "Blood Mountain," and I'm surprisingly okay with that. Odd, considering I am in no way a fan of metal. Aside from Dillinger Escape Plan's "Miss Machine," the genre was, to me, a vast wasteland of no-talent ass clowns trying to prove their manhood by playing louder and faster than competing no-talent ass clowns. But Mastodon has a surprising amount of talent, which secures the band a spot at the top of the metal food chain, even if they're towards the bottom of my list. Make no mistake about it, "Blood Mountain" is one of the finest rock albums of the year, and probably one of the most solid metal albums ever! If you're into that genre, you've probably already heard this album. If you're not, first, congratulations! Second, go buy it! You have no excuse not to.

Mastodon makes it all the way to #30 on my top albums of 2006. Hopefully my balls will survive.

Top 31 Songs of 2006: #30

The Pipettes - "Pull Shapes" from the album We are the Pipettes.